I have been a pastor for over 20 years, If you read some of my other blogs you get a sense of what I have been up to. I love coming together as a community of faith and yet I wonder sometimes what a gathering is supposed to accomplish. I get the sense sometimes that people expect more really which makes it seem that we should do a better job with the service itself. Are people bored? Should we make it more exciting? Should there be more of a production?  I spent much of my early life making sure that we had a great Sunday morning. ( I grew cynical of all that) Now I do not want to sound like I am bitter I am not, but it seems that this is want society expects, they want a leader that can make it all happen, be the cheer leader, rally the troops, make great things happen etc. Plan stuff for everyone to do? 

But is "the" service supposed to be great or is "our" service supposed to be great, Is" the" service supposed to be the thing that excites us or is "our" service the thing that makes life exciting 

I would guess that it could be both, but I wonder how what chance does the church really have if we rely to heavy on "the" service to get the job done, is there a real passion to live our lives for Christ on a day to day basis. 

What is it that stimulates most Christians

I reflect all the time on life, what Christ expected what it is we are supposed to be doing, I love the focus so many are putting on grass roots movements, things organic. sometimes these things just become new buzz words  that wear out. I watched a movie tonight that really touched me and my wife. New In town. Now I am easily moved so don't throw me under the bus. It is about a Executive from Miami that moves to a small town in Minnesota to down size a plant and make it more modern. Yes it is predictable but there were aspects of the movie that really touched me. How we we celebrate big and grand for the price of community and relationship. I reflect on how in ministry if it was not big and getting bigger it has little value. I am sad for our country what we have lost, what we have sacrificed for bigger and better, what is crazy is all of our advancement has not made life simpler, and easier, but more stressed and well you know.  I work another job and I recently had a couple of great experiences that I really enjoyed.( I work as a golf pro at a private club as well as pastor the church) There are a couple of men in there mid eighties that I see all the time. Over the last year they have asked me to play golf with them some morning, I have always told them I would sometime. Recently one of them had some back issues and could not play golf and I realized that he might not be able to play one day. As soon as he got better I set aside the time to play with these men that grew up in a different time, we just played nine holes but it was great watching these men interact with one another and enjoying spending time with me a younger man. One of the men insisted that I eat lunch with them which I did. we sat around the table for almost two hours sharing about life in many areas, it was great. 

I went home that day wondering if this was the kind of ministry Jesus was talking about, and how much we miss or not appreciate those moments or even see them as kingdom work.

On the opposite side  of that, we had a Junior Golf Camp this past week and I am over 6-8 year old kids. there is a little boy (7) in the group  that took a real interest in my help and while I worked hard to help all the kids this little boy drew me a picture today and when I got to camp he gave it to me. It was a Picture of him in stick figure form with his hands in the air holding a flag stick with a big smile on his face with a note to the side "Jack is my best Teacher"

I could of cried my eyes out when he gave it to me, It is on my the frig now. Is this the kind of thing Jesus wants us to be doing. I contrast experiences like this all the time. For me it is very different I am not a person that has a Job or two Jobs for that matter, I am a man living life and see His Kingdom around me, I work hard at the incarnational approach to life and ministry. I refuse to separate the two. I am so glad for experiences like these. I have had the honor  in the past of speaking to seveal thousand people back in my preaching up "a storm days", and having people clap for things I said. I remember feeling powerful but it was more about what I was feeling then peoples lives really changing ( verses )a simple picture from a little boy at golf camp.

In the church setting I felt strong. When I was handed the picture from the little boy ,I felt humbled and honored if for only this  week to help a little boy feel special.

Back to the movie, lets not forget it is relationships that matter the most, people are not programs and while we all want to achieve great things one of the greatest things we can do is on a personal level one on one help those around us feel better about who they are, it is what Jesus did best, we can all do it

No matter where we work or what we do, it is about who we are and who they are lets not forget it.

Jesus said if you you love feed my sheep, lets all examine what it is we are feeding those around us.

What is it like to be a follower of Christ everyday? How do our lives make an impact? How does the message really expand and change the climate we live in? Can the church really grow with out a Sunday Morning emphasis? Does the average Christian really believe that they can make a difference living day to day? 

These are questions I think about all the time especially since I as the Pastor of the church decided a few years ago to work another job along side the ministry. Let me give you the context. At one time I had 11 staff people and a fairly large church by American Standards, I changed direction to follow my heart and the Lord. I was tired of the Western expression and felt like all I was doing was raising money for bigger buildings, you can read part of my journey in an earlier blog to get an overview.

Now as a leader that was used to many comforts,( yes from hard work) freedom in my schedule etc. I was now back in the real world. the world of setting an alarm to get up early to drive in traffic, to having a boss I could see, to schedules to keep to a job that had to be done, to driving home in traffic feeling the pull of responsibility  in my life being a good worker, trying to live the kingdom, keeping up my responsibilities and leadership at the church. 

I know have  a great appreciation for what people go through day to day, I had forgotten to be honest. 25 years ago when I got into "full time ministry" my goal was to build a church to make a difference. I remember those around me encouraging me to get enough people so that I did not have to work a "secular" job. It is interesting when I look back what my preaching was like. Challenging people all the time to read, and get involved in the community. I would brag about all the books I read and the things I was doing all in the name of being a good example. Funny I still read but much less now then I did then. I don't have the time I used to.

How do people make a difference in their community when they have a job, and a wife, and kids, and soccer games, and friends to get with. a lawn to cut, a house to keep up. It sounds so easy from the pulpit. Trust me it is not easy at all. I am not bitter, I feel I am better because of it. To be honest all of this has lead America to hire Pastors to make sure that the Sunday morning is awesome and the programs are great for those that have time to squeeze them in, and we still gauge success by how many come.

But is this really living the kingdom. I am a cynic if the  only hope for the world is to build a better service and our greatest strength is our Sunday Morning and the campuses we can build then most of the world will be lost.

I love the incarnational view He lived among them, and as Alan says in his book it is like He moved into your neighborhood. For me the Living in the Kingdom is all of those things above, the job, the soccer game, the cutting the lawn and all the other things we do. Jesus had a job most of his life that we know He was a carpenter. Did he have an impact building things with His dad, I think he did. 

We have to help people see that it is the everyday that does matter, and we represent His Government every where we go. It really is who we are, the problem with America is we have roots deep in democracy believing all the time that the "correct" leader will make the difference for us, while at the same time make no real changes ourself. Look how everyone no matter where you stands tends to relax once a leader is put in place and life goes back to normal. No more rallies no more spreading the message no more bumper stickers, they just fade as many hope for a better future. If we as Americans really believe that big companies should not live on debt and borrowed money, then we need to make sure that we all have plastic surgery, if not then can we really complain.

I try to encourage people to live in the rhythm of society to see life bigger to not minimize the things they are doing but to see the Lord in it all to not view life dualistic. I try in my job to live the Kingdom not overtly but with an authentic way that makes people wonder. I can tell you it is much easier to invite people to a Sunday morning gig then to live a daily life among the people. 

As I reflect over all the leadership conferences I have been to that have dealt with how to grow the church and I read parts of a book that someone sent me about the topic. the focus was all surface. Have a clean nursery, have some friendly greeters, have an great programs and a How to guide to do that.

As I think about those days, I never remember anyone reading from the Sermon on the Mount, anyone preaching on humility, turning the other cheek, walking the second mile, being a person of peace, what it means to be a servant, explaining the Beatitudes to me. To me most of them have been no better then any corporate meeting one might attend on how to get people in the door. Lots of glitz and glamour, its what we are used to. I am not saying we should not do things with excellence, I just wonder why we do them. 

I would encouarage every Pastor in America to not quit their church and find another job, but if they have a large church and have forgotten what it is like to be their congregation in having to juggle a job and their commitments at their Church, and family etc. then pick up a part time job for 6 months and allow it to refresh your memory, after all being a disciple is not a career path. It is a life to be lived daily.

I am thankful for our community of faith that supports me and helps me, we have a different thing going on and are having a blast most of the time.

I am hopeful and filled with faith that things are changing,

Well that is enough, I find it hard to express my thoughts in writing at times, but there it is I hope it is understood.

Trying to live it daily

Jack

Yesterday I Henri Nouwen's book "In the Name of Jesus" (Reflections on Christian Leadership) I must say other then Leading with a Limp by Dan Allendar which to be honest is one of may all time favorites but this one here is really awesome. It was written in 1989 and while it may take only an hour to read it will take a life time to flesh out.I do not want to give anything away but wow. it is so different then most things you read about leadership. if anyone reads it let me know what you all think

My Name is Jack Wolfe I have been apart of the journey that many are on since I first read The Shaping of Things to come in 2003. What an interesting 6 years it has been.

I had all these stirrings prior to reading this book and felt conflicted as a Pastor in America. My wife and I started our church in 1988 we loved the Lord and did all the things that we were taught to do to plant a church from scratch. We had no families to start with just us. Our Church grew from 4-800 in 15 years. we were successful, 11 staff people, money, land to expand. These stirrings I had that year prior to our 15th anniversary were troubling. I felt lost and confused.

I stood at our Anniversary celebration with just a few people less then 1000 and looking out on the crowd asked myself this question. Is this it? only bigger. building programs, raising money etc. Now don't get me wrong I loved those people and our church was cool and real and honest and many great things took place. But what happens to a Pastor and his family that have worked hard to have all of this and then does not really want it like this any more.

Well I could not do it like that any more, with many meetings with a counselor and my wife and leaders at the time. I wanted to change directions, to be true to what I was feeling in my heart, I had so Identified with the concepts of "Shaping" it was like pouring gas on a fire. I thought I could transition the church. The land we had which was 43 acres we sold, the problem was that we had already spent money on plans to build a 1200 seat sanctury, so how do you tell people you changed your mind.

Well I tried, we all tried, some thought I was a little crazy but this message struck the core of who I felt I was and what the Lord was really all about.

Well I won't get into the details but suffice to say. I have some real experience in transition.

We sold the land, that made most people upset and dissilusioned and I do not blame them. it was what we were doing at the time. We laid off staff because people left over time since the vision changed. I took a job as the pastor outside of the church and cut our salary from the church. So now I work in the golf business as well as lead the church. 

Today we own 6 acres of what we call a third place ministry  it is in the burbs of Atlanta.

Our lives have changed so much I am trying to figure out the best way to lead and live and not go back to the old ways of an attractional way of doing ministry. 

Working another job so to speak ( I hate dualism) makes life a real challenge. it is so easy to be a Christian when you are paid to be one. but what do members of our communities deal with? How hard is it for them? How do we build careers and live the kingdom? 

Well anyway there is a bit about me and my journey. It has been hard on my wife and I but we stay encouraged, pioneering has never been easy. 

I look forward to dialogue on this site. I do not really like to write but I will try. I would rather talk, but I am just glad to be in the conversation on any level.

http://www.myepicfaith.org/epicenter.htm

Jack Wolfe